Marriage
|
3. What must I do to know who is the woman God has appointed to be my
wife? |
|
Now
brother, before I answer your question, I want to give this important
introduction. Beloved in the Lord, first of all you must understand and bear
in mind that God loves you very much, and He manifested this love toward you,
too, by sending His Son into the world so that you might live through Him;
secondly, that God cares for you, He is interested in your good, in other
words, He thinks only of doing good to you. Another thing you must understand
and bear in mind is that God knows you fully, He knows your deepest desires,
He knows all your needs. Nobody else knows so well your heart and your ways
as God. One more thing, know this, that He can do all things, nothing is
impossible with God; the hearts of all men are in His hand and He turns them
wherever He wishes in order to fulfil His plans for them. And last but not
least, you must understand and bear in mind that the steps of men are
directed by God, yes, by our God; obviously, we walk, but our way is not in
ourselves because it is God who directs our steps. He causes us to meet those
people He wants us to meet, and we meet them in the way and at the time
appointed by God. |
|
Now what
you must do to know or to find out who is the person God wants you to marry
(obviously, provided that you have been called to get married because as you
know there are some believers who have not been called to get married, as it
is written: “Each one has his own gift from God, one in this manner and
another in that” 1 Corinthians 7:7 – NKJV) is this: be perfectly quiet, and
trust with all your heart in the Lord. “In quietness and in confidence shall
be your strength” (Isaiah 30:15), says the Scripture. Knowing that our God is
so great, powerful and wise, and that He loves us so much and wants to give
us the best, you must be quiet and trust in the Lord. |
|
Your
unshakeable faith in God will lead you to pray, for if you believe that God
loves you, knows you fully and wants to give you and can give you the desire
of your heart in accordance with His will, you will certainly call upon His
name so that He might supply your need. The apostle Paul says: “Be anxious
for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving,
let your requests be made known to God; and the peace of God, which surpasses
all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus” (Philippians
4:6-7 - NKJV). As you can see, prayer will have positive effect on you in
that God will guard your heart and mind by causing His peace, which surpasses
all understanding, to reign in your heart. The prophet Isaiah, who lived several
centuries before Paul, expressed this concept in these terms: “You will keep
him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because He trusts in You”
(Isaiah 26:3 – NKJV). Therefore, even if your prayer has not yet been answered
by God, know this, that if you continue to trust in God, without doubting,
the great peace of God you feel in your heart will be the sign attesting that
God delights in you, for you trust in His name with all your heart. Yes,
because God takes pleasure in those who have faith in Him, who hope in His
faithfulness and goodness, and He rewards them, during their wait, with His
great and precious peace. |
|
Pray God
without ceasing. Know this, that God’s ears are open to your prayer, He sees
your tears, He considers even your sighs and at His appointed time He will
answer your prayer. |
|
Your
confidence in God, however, will lead you not only to pray God so that He
might supply your need but also to behave seriously toward the unmarried
sisters you will meet. In other words, you will not take pleasure in courting
all the unmarried sisters you will meet – as some do among the Churches –
because you want to court only the sister who is to become your wife by God’s
set purpose. So you will avoid flirtations, lest you delude yourself and
others. Perhaps you will say: ‘How can I be sure that I am courting the right
woman?’ You can be sure you are courting the right woman because when one has
an unshakeable confidence in God and he prays to Him without ceasing, he
knows for certain in his heart that when he meets the woman chosen by God a
great and wonderful thing will take place in both his heart and her heart. I
mean that it will come to pass that God will stir up both spirits and will
direct both hearts toward one another. In other words, God will cause them to
fall in love with one another. Perhaps the spark that will kindle this fire
in both hearts will seem very strange and unusual to some, but I assure you
that the fire will be kindled. One thing is certain, in both hearts, by God’s
set purpose, a true and great love will begin between you and the woman whom
God appointed for you, whom God will cause you to meet when you don’t expect
to meet her. Then you will say, to yourself first and then to her: “You have
ravished my heart, my sister, my spouse; you have ravished my heart with one
look of your eyes” (Song of Solomon 4:9 – NKJV), and likewise she will say
about you: “I am my beloved’s. And his desire is toward me” (Song of Solomon |
|
I would
like to tell you another thing. Before you meet your wife, God may give you a
revelation, by a vision or a dream or an audible voice, by which He tells you
clearly who is the person you will marry. Obviously, your future wife also may
receive a revelation from God, thus when you meet each other for the first
time both of you know already that God wants you to get married. God may give
you the revelation even after you have met the woman who is to become your
wife (for instance, in case the woman has been attending the same church you
attend or another church you visit from time to time). Sometimes, therefore
not always, God works in this manner. However, one thing is certain, no
matter how God will cause you to meet each other, God will cause you to fall
in love with one another, and not only this, He will also make your paths
straight so that you may get married and live together. |
|
In
conclusion, brother, I exhort you to have faith in God; He will not disappoint
you nor confuse you in your hope, because He will give you the desire of your
heart, what you ask Him in faith. Wisdom says: “He has made everything
beautiful in its time” (Ecclesiastes |